Skulduggery Pleasant stuff
by Sapphire Iota
Summary: Skulduggery Pleasant drabbles, one shots, etc. Sorry, I'm not exactly a regular updater :(
1. Valkyrie vs the sofa

**A/N. ****R+R. Pretty pretty please?**

Valkyrie Cain spun round, lashing out a kick. Before she'd even finished turning, shadow knives whipped up and drove themselves into her target. She lunged forward, landing in three elbows and a punch before clicking her fingers to summon fire, which she threw at her opponent.

Valkyrie stepped back, breathing heavily. The fake dummy turned to charcoal.

"I'd say that's quite dead," a velvety voice remarked behind her, as Skulduggery Pleasant looked at the dummy. Valkyrie shrugged.

"I'll just make sure." She teased, and shadows rose, slashing the blackened remains into dust.

Skulduggery made a sound that might've been a laugh. "Yes, it's definitely dead now."

She grinned. "So, are we doing more combat?"

"We can't."

She frowned. "Why not?"

"Because that was the last combat dummy."

She glared at him. "You could've told me that."

He shrugged. "I could have. I chose not to."

Valkyrie rolled her eyes. "So it's magic then?"

He tilted his head. "You don't sound overly enthusiastic. I thought you wanted to learn magic."

"I do," she replied. "I was just hoping to see Tanith today."

"Tomorrow, I promise," he said as they walked to the other side of the… it wasn't exactly room. It was three times the size of Valkyrie's school gym. One area was for combat, with crash mats, a sword arena and step-by-step instructions on how to do different fighting moves.

Another area had treadmills, benches, and weights. It was for increasing her strength and stamina. Valkyrie hated going over there.

They were heading towards another area. This place had heat-proof mats, a small pool of water to manipulate and some stuff to push around. Fun.

Valkyrie couldn't help but grin as she flexed her fingers, and a tattered old sofa crashed into a wall. She turned around to ask Skulduggery which element they were doing today, and was just opening her mouth when she was hit from behind.

Taken by surprise, she dropped to her knees.

A skeletal hand reached out to help her to her feet. She swatted it away as she stood.

"What?..."

Then she saw that the sofa had moved. She frowned at it, then turned to glare at Skulduggery.

"Did you send that sofa at me?"

Skulduggery hesitated. "Technically, I suppose I did…"

Her glare deepened.

"I was expecting you to block it!" he protested.

Valkyrie scowled at him. "I had my back to it!"

He nodded. "So now you have learnt a valuable lesson. Never turn your back on a dangerous enemy."

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, because sofas are such dangerous opponents."

Skulduggery tilted his head, and she just knew that he was smiling. "That one knocked you to the ground."

It took all Valkyrie's self-control not to throw something at him. He chuckled and turned away.

Still glaring, she followed.

**A/N So there it is! I hope you liked it.**** Thanks for reading. Please review!**

**SapphireShadowgirl **


	2. Dark side

Song fic

**A/N I've been thinking of doing this for a while now. It just strikes me as perfect for Skulduggery Pleasant. The song is 'Dark Side' by Kelly Clarkson. WARNING! MAJOR DARK DAYS SPOILER! DO ****NOT ****READ UNLESS YOU'VE READ THE END OF DARK DAYS! Also, I don't own anything. Set between Dark Days and Mortal Coil. Basically Valkyrie wondering how to tell Skulduggery about her true name.**

**Dark side**

_There's a place that I know,_

_It's not pretty there but few have ever gone,_

What would Skulduggery do if he found out that she was Darquesse?

_If I show it to you now,_

_Will it make you run away?_

Would he hate her, turn his back on her? Valkyrie shook her head. He wouldn't do that. Would he?

_Or will you stay,_

_Even if it hurts?_

Or would he stick by her? After all, Skulduggery said that he would be there until the end. But what if this was the end for them? Tears rose in her eyes, and she angrily brushed them away. She couldn't stand the thought of losing Skulduggery.

_Even if I try to push you out will you return?_

_And remind me who I really am,_

_Please remind me who I really am_

If there was one person who would be able to talk to Darquesse, if she ever came out, it would be Skulduggery. He would be able to remind her who she was, she was sure of it.

_Everybody's got a dark side,_

_Do you love me?_

_Can you love mine?_

Would he still love her if she told him? Everyone had a side to them that they didn't like. It was just that Valkyrie's was worse than most.

_Nobody's picture perfect,_

A lot worse than most.

_But we're worth it_

_You know that we're worth it,_

Would he think that keeping her alive was worth the risk of destroying the world? Was she worth that much to him? Valkyrie let out a groan. Why couldn't it be simple? She rolled out of bed and got dressed, hoping that a walk would calm her down.

_Will you love me?_

_Even with my dark side?_

She walked along the pier. Would she still mean as much to him if she told him that she was Darquesse?

_Like a diamond_

_From black dust,_

_It's hard to know_

_What can become if you give up,_

Valkyrie stood by the freezing water. She remembered the time she had jumped off the pier to get rid of twenty Infected. Why not do the same thing now? It would be best for everyone if she just gave up.

_So don't give up on me,_

She shook her head. What was she doing, thinking these thoughts? She sighed.

Valkyrie hoped that Skulduggery wouldn't give up on her. Ever.

_Please remind me who I really am._

She hoped that if the time ever came, if she ever became Darquesse, that Skulduggery would remind her who she was.

_Everybody's got a dark side,_

_Do you love me?_

_Can you love mine?_

Her mind kept returning to the same question. Would he still love her?

_Nobody's picture perfect,_

_But we're worth it_

_You know that we're worth it,_

Would he still think she was worth it?

_Will you love me?_

_Even with my dark side?_

Would he? If he knew who she was, who she truly was. Her true name. _Darquesse._

_Don't run away,_

_Don't run away,_

Valkyrie wouldn't know what to do if he left.

_Just tell me that you'll stay,_

_Promise me you'll stay,_

She hoped that he'd see, that he'd stay by her.

_Don't run away,_

_Don't run away,_

She watched the dark waves. Would he stay until the end?

_Just promise me you will stay,_

_Promise me you'll stay,_

He'd promised.

_Will you love me? Oh,_

_Everybody's got a dark side,_

_Do you love me?_

_Can you love mine?_

She kicked a pebble hard. Would he still love her if he saw her other side? The side that was destined to destroy the world? To kill him and her family?

_Nobody's picture perfect,_

_But we're worth it_

_You know that we're worth it,_

She remembered trying to get Skulduggery to tell why he had abandoned his crest. He'd said something about how war brought out another side of him. She'd told him that he was a good person. Whatever had happened, he was worth it. But would he say the same for her?

_Will you love me?_

_Even with my dark side?_

For her dark side.

_Don't run away_

_Don't run away_

_Don't run away,_

_Promise, you'll stay._

"Oh Skulduggery," she whispered to the pounding sea. "Please stay."

**A/N Yay! Finally! Hope that wasn't too soppy, or too OOC, or whatever. I did it in 5 minutes, while I was stuck on my other story, **_**Skulduggery Pleasant and the curse of the immortal dead,**_** so…. Don't you think that song is perfect? R&R please! Review button is down there *points***

**SapphireShadowgirl :)**


	3. Rescuing a sister part 1

Rescuing a sister, part 1

**A/N I own nothing except for Olive and Rowan Misery. And Rat, I suppose, but he doesn't do much. Just so you know, Rowan Misery is a Necromancer who kidnaps mortals and holds them for ransom. Valkyrie is 30 in this, which makes Alice 14 I think. Correct me if I'm wrong. I found it really hard to write about Alice. I don't know what it is, but she's really hard to write about. Hope you like **

Rowan Misery strode confidently down the street, wondering who to pick as her next target. Not that couple over there. The man looked strong. Not those homeless people. No-one would pay a ransom for them. Rowan fingered her black necklace, thinking.

A young girl hurried past, her head down and brown hair dangling past her face. Rowan sized her up. Early teens. Expensive clothes, so someone obviously cared for. Not too strong. No signs of magic. Perfect.

Rowan started to follow.

**XxXxX**

Alice walked home, hands in her pockets and thinking about Michael. She was so wrapped up in her thoughts, she didn't see the shadows until they hit, slamming her into the wall and gagging her before Alice could even consider screaming,

It took a moment for her brain to understand what had happened, and then she started to struggle frantically. But the shadows held her down- how was that possible?- and a pair of dark green eyes came into her vision. They held a horrible glint of amusement.

Something hard pressed into her throat, making her cry out silently, and then her vision went black. As she fell, Alice heard a female voice murmur,

"The perfect kidnap."

When Alice came to, the shadows were gone. Rubbing her wrists, she looked around. She was in some kind of dark, stone room that smelt of moss and mould.

Alice's jacket was gone, and she shivered. Who was that woman? How had she used shadows? She remembered those words. _The perfect kidnap. _But why would this woman want to kidnap her?

"Are you new?" The voice made Alice jump. Slowly, he turned around to see curious eyes. There was a small girl in the corner. Slowly, Alice nodded.

"Who are you?" she asked. The girl shrugged. She couldn't have been more than nine.

"My name's Olive. Who're you?"

Alice hesitated. "My name's Alice," she replied. "What's going on?"

The girl, Olive, pulled a face. "Honestly, why does everyone ask that?"

Alice stared at her blankly, and Olive sighed, flicking filthy brown hair over her shoulder.

"We were kidnapped. Dunno why. Shadow-woman," she shivered, "Kidnaps us and takes us here and keeps us here until… I dunno. Some people leave, some people don't. There're only two of us at the moment. Three now, I suppose, counting you. I've been here for… a while."

Alice blinked, wondering what to ask first. It was so overwhelming, so terrifying. "Shadow-woman?"

Olive looked around nervously, like she was afraid someone would hear them. Her voice dropped.

"She's the one who brings us here. The shadows do what she wants them to. We don't stand a chance against her."

Alice remembered how her kidnapper had used those shadows to hold her against the wall. She wanted to believe that Olive was lying or mistaken, but she had seen what happened. A cold lump of fear formed in her chest. There really was no escape.

Olive yawned. "I'm tired. Night. Oh, if Rat starts screaming," she said, gesturing to a sleeping boy that Alice hadn't noticed before, "Kick him."

She rolled over and closed her eyes.

Alice tucked her knees up to her chest. How could Olive and Rat (Was that his real name?) stand the cold? It was freezing in here.

What would her family do when they realised she hadn't come home? Would they worry? Would they call the police? Would they ever find her?

If only she'd seen the woman, Shadow-woman, earlier. Then maybe she could've used the self-defence moves Stephanie had taught her. Stephanie.

Alice scooted around until she found a comfortable spot (well, comfortable-ish, anyway) and looked at the ceiling. She hoped Stephanie was okay. She was supposed to be staying at the family house for the weekend. How long would it be until she found out that Alice was missing?

Tears started to form in her eyes, trickling down her cheeks in a steady stream. She curled up and just cried.

After a bit- it was impossible to track time here-Alice's eyes started to close. As she twisted around, trying to find a good position to sleep in, she noticed some strange lines above Olive's head, carved into the stone wall.

Bleary-eyed, Alice dragged herself over to look at them. They were like tally marks. Four lines and a slash.

She traced one with her finger. These were man-made. Or maybe Olive-made.

She counted them silently. There were 272 lines. Were they for each day Olive had been here? That would be- she did a quick calculation in her head- about 9 months.

Alice looked down at the sleeping girl, shocked. Had Olive really been here for that long? Nine months, without family or friends, except maybe Rat?

She couldn't think any more. She just curled up and fell asleep

**XxXxX**

Valkyrie looked out of the window as they drove by the sea, watching how the setting sun made the water glimmer. She loved the sea.

The Bentley glided along, nearing the town of Haggard. Regretfully, Valkyrie turned away from the ocean, letting her hair hide her face. She didn't want anyone to recognise her.

Skulduggery tilted his head a little, and she knew that he was looking at her. He touched his façade, and a face flowed up. Tonight he had windswept dark hair and brown eyes.

"Are you okay?"

She shrugged. "A little tired. And nervous about staying with my family for the weekend. Do we have a case tomorrow?"

He shook his head. "Not at the moment."

Valkyrie sighed with relief. "So I can actually get a full night's sleep for once."

"But not me. Poor overworked me doesn't get to sleep," Skulduggery replied.

Valkyrie laughed. "You're a skeleton."

"I noticed."

She rolled her eyes. "Skeletons don't need to sleep, Skulduggery."

"How would you know?"

"Because you told me."

He tilted his head. "I did?"

She smirked. "What did you say yesterday about your perfect memory?"

"I bet you would find it difficult if you had over 400 years' worth of memories."

Valkyrie shrugged again. "But I don't."

They pulled up by her house and hesitated before opening the car door.

"What is it?" Skulduggery asked.

Valkyrie frowned. "Something doesn't feel right."

"Do you want me to wait a bit?"

She looked at him gratefully. "If you wouldn't mind."

He nodded, and she slid out the car and walked up to her front door. It felt… strange, not to be going in through the window.

She rang the doorbell and waited. No-one came to the door. She frowned, checking her watch. Alice should've been home from school 2 hours ago.

Valkyrie ran around the back, summoning a gust of air to propel her onto the windowsill, like she used to do every single day.

The lights were off. She crept through her room, and opened her bedroom door quietly. There was obviously no-one home.

Valkyrie jumped out the window again and ran to Skulduggery.

"Alice isn't in."

She could tell he was frowning. "She could just be late."

"School ended an hour ago. Skulduggery, something's happened to her, I know it."

He started up the engine. "Get in the car. Have you tried calling her?"

Valkyrie jumped in the seat, digging her phone out of her pocket. Why hadn't she thought of that?

Skulduggery glanced back.

"Seatbelt."

**A/N This probably wasn't amazing. I meant to have it all in one chapter, but it kind of got dragged out. I'll do a sequel at some point **** It's centred on the idea that by the end of the series, her family still don't know about magic. **** Please review! **

**SapphireShadowgirl**


	4. the boy in the park

The boy in the park

**A/N Don't worry, I will continue with my Alice thing. But I felt like putting this in here. This is actually a true story, from when I was six, waiting for my Mum. Sorry about the shortness.**

I walked up and down the log, my hands out to keep my balance. I swayed, and then slipped off. Scowling, I sat down. Where was Mum?

I was so tired and miserable. Today, one of the boys at school thought it would be funny to run around with my jumper for a while. Stupid boys. Of course, he didn't get in trouble. But I did, because I was late to class. Stupid boy. Stupid teacher.

Grumpily, I kicked the log, which was a mistake. Tears sprung to my eyes as I gasped in pain. Why was everything going wrong today?

There was a brown haired-boy walking up the path. His face was exhausted and miserable, and he was more dragging himself along than walking.

I felt a little sorry for him. Was he okay?

He looked up, and his chocolate brown eyes fixed on mine. A ghost of a smile formed on his face as he shrugged.

"Yeah, I'm okay. My day's been about as bad as yours," he said sadly.

I blinked. I hadn't spoken. I was sure of it. How?...

The boy looked back over his shoulder. "No, of course you didn't speak. But why should that matter to me?"

**A/N Yeah. Not the most exciting story. But it's true. I swear. I was kind of creeped out that he could read my thoughts. If you've read **_**Skulduggery Pleasant and the curse of the immortal dead, **_**you may or may not have guessed that this boy is where I got the idea from for Liaf's power.**

**If you're wondering, yes, I met the boy again. Actually, we became friends until I had to move again. But that's another story. A very, very long story **

**I promise I'll put something good up soon. Once I've stopped drowning in homework. **

**SapphireShadowgirl**

**P.S Alex? I'm still looking.**


	5. Clarabelle at Target

Clarabelle's trip to Target

**A/N I decided to write this at the suggestion of some reviews from my quiz fic **** I don't actually know what Target's like, I've never been. I hope I got it more or less correct.**

**P.S I haven't abandoned 'Rescuing a sister', I'm just taking my time about getting back to it. Sorry.**

Clarabelle was getting a few strange looks as she walked down the aisle. She was starting to worry. Should she have left at least one bottle of blue hair-dye on the shelves? Oh well. She needed them.

Peering over the mountain of hair dye in her trolley, Clarabelle looked for a pet section. She really needed a new pet.

A young boy stood in the centre of the confectionary aisle, gumming a lollipop. So _that _was what boys ate. Clarabelle had always thought that boys only ever ate mud.

She wandered up to the boy.

"Hello," she said. "Will you be my pet?"

The boy's eyes widened and he stopped licking the lollipop, tongue still stuck out. Clarabelle peered at it.

"Where's your price tag?"

The boy stared at her a second more, before tipping his head back and wailing.

"Mamma! Mamma! I want Mamma!" Tears started to pour down his cheeks. Clarabelle felt bad about making him cry, so she took another lollipop off the shelf and gave it to him.

"Here you go," She said happily, already starting to wander off in another direction. What should she buy?

A two-litre bottle of vinegar caught her eye, and she gasped. It would be a perfect present for Gerald! But was it good vinegar?

She picked it up, turned it upside down and tried to unscrew the bottom. Nothing happened. She walked towards the shelf, holding the bottle like a baseball bat.

_Smash!_

Pieces of bottle flew everywhere, thankfully missing Clarabelle, who licked the vinegar off the bottle. Yep. Very good.

She stole a nearby trolley emptied the contents all over the floor, and half-filled it with vinegar bottles.

On the opposite shelf were multiple food colouring dyes. Clarabelle's eyes widened at the sight of the prettiness.

The yellow was so bright and happy… but the red was cool. The blue was the same colour as her hair dye!

_Half an hour later_

Clarabelle prayed silently for the poor animal. She was the only one attending its funeral.

The stack of ham was buried underneath a grave of vegetables and rice in the middle of the bread aisle. Clarabelle had stolen a kite to use as a cross, which lay on top of the grave.

Clarabelle's eyes filled with tears for the ham.

'You will be remembered," she whispered.

An old lady glanced down the aisle. She saw a crazy looking woman with hair that looked like assorted food colourings had been dumped on it, in front of 3 full trolleys containing hair-dye, vinegar, gummy-bears and assorted spices. The crazy woman was kneeling in the middle of the floor, ignoring the shards of glass and scattered food-colouring bottles, and seemed to be worshiping a huge pile of vegetables and rice with a kite sticking out of the top.

The old lady backed away, deciding that her packet of cinnamon could wait until another day.

Clarabelle held a minutes silence for the ham, which was broken only by an announcement over the intercom;

'Check out our kiddie's toys at the back of the store! On sale! Buy now!'

_What a good idea, _Clarabelle thought. She tried to drag the trolleys towards the toy section, before realising how difficult it was to drag three full trolleys around.

Clarabelle frowned at them for a minute.

"Get lighter," she ordered. Nothing happened.

Scowling, Clarabelle looked around to see what she could use.

A few minutes later, a length of rope- from another aisle- was tied around the handles of each trolley, and then attached to Clarabelle's waist.

She walked down the aisle, not really hearing the crashing sounds from behind her.

BANG! BANG! CRASH!

SMASH! CRASH! THUD!

SQUEEEEAK! BANG! CLATTER!

Clarabelle made a beeline for the toy section. Shoppers looked up as she approached.

Behind her, there were cries of alarm as the trolleys bounced into people.

Clarabelle's world stopped suddenly. She could only see one thing. It was amazing. It was miraculous. It was perfection.

She broke into a sprint, ignoring the weight of the trolleys, unable to tear her eyes off the object, deaf to the surprised yells of people around her.

Her hand shot out, and then Clarabelle was cradling the magnificence known as Barbie.

She looked up, and saw shelves of this perfection. Her eyes widened. Clarabelle was in heaven.

She examined each and every Barbie carefully trying to find the best Barbie. But then she caught sight of something even better.

Clarabelle saw a kids bow and arrow set.

She ripped off the plastic covering and tore through the box. She slowly pulled out the bow.

Clarabelle wasn't the best shot in the world. Her first shot went backwards, before she figured out that you had to point it the _other _way.

Arrows flew madly, hitting shelves that had been shoved aside by the trolleys. Clarabelle laughed happily.

She shot all the arrows in the quiver, before getting bored. She'd been here long enough.

Clarabelle turned towards the exit, stopping only the pick up a few arrows on the floor.

She strode past the checkout, ignoring the shop employees.

"Oi! You need to buy that!"

Clarabelle continued walking, trolleys destroying what was left of the store. The employees backed away.

The crazy woman left the store, trolleys bouncing behind her, and shop-lifter alarms blaring. That was so fun. She should do Kenspeckle's groceries more often.

**A/N. That was fun. Probably wasn't amazing, but I don't care. It was sooooooooo much fun :) :) :) R+R please. If you want you can request something, but I have lots of half-written fics, so you might have to wait a bit.**

**Sapphire Shadowgirl Xxx**


	6. When Valkyrie disappears

When Valkyrie disappears

**A/N Warning, KOTW spoilers. Skulduggery's POV when Valkyrie shunts for the first time. Summer Rosewood, sorry but I don't really want to write about the boy in the park. It's sort of personal. I hope you don't mind, sorry. But I will tell you that his taken name was Alex Stone.**

Valkyrie looked up, her dark eyes wide and afraid.

"What the hell is going on? Skulduggery? Everything's disappearing. What's wrong with-"

She disappeared. Skulduggery lunged for the spot where she'd been, but it was too late. Valkyrie was gone.

He spun around, hoping that she was just behind him. But the alley way was empty.

Trying to control his panic, Skulduggery yanked his phone out of the pocket of his jacket and dialled her number. It rung once.

Twice.

Three times.

Four times.

Five times.

_The number you are trying to connect to is offline. Please try again later._

Skulduggery cursed, almost throwing the phone onto the ground in frustration and worry. Valkyrie's phone was magically enhanced. How could it be offline? What had happened to her?

He dialled another number. This time, the phone was picked up on the first ring.

"Skulduggery?" said the tired voice of Ghastly Bespoke.

"Valkyrie's missing," Skulduggery told him instantly. He was already striding towards the Bentley.

"What do you mean, she's missing?" Ghastly replied, confused.

"She just disappeared. I don't know what happened, but I need to find her Ghastly. I have to."

Skulduggery couldn't put his desperation, fear, anger and worry into words. He just hoped that Ghastly would know all of that, would understand just how much Valkyrie meant to him.

Ghastly's voice softened. "I'll get some Cleavers looking for her right now. I promise we'll find her. What exactly happened?"

Skulduggery's façade closed its eyes. "We were just walking down the street, talking. She stumbled, I caught her. She said that everything kept disappearing, and then she just vanished. I tried ringing her phone, but she didn't pick up."

He could almost hear Ghastly frowning.

"Okay, get to the Sanctuary," Ghastly commanded. "And, Skulduggery, do you have any idea where she might be or what might've happened?"

Skulduggery shook his head, even though he knew Ghastly couldn't see him.

"None," he replied. "None at all."

Skulduggery drove the Bentley as fast as he dared, swerving expertly around the corners.

As he drove, his mind thought of a million possibilities, disproving them one by one.

Teleportation? No, he would have seen if Fletcher was there. The pineapple hair was hard to miss.

Cloaking sphere? No. She hadn't disappeared from one side to the other, all of her vanished at once.

A new freaky enemy? Skulduggery groaned. That was the last thing they needed.

A call came on his Bluetooth, nearly making him swerve into a wall. Valkyrie! Skulduggery answered it as quickly as he could.

"Hi," Valkyrie's familiar voice said. "I'm back."

**A/N Done :) Now I have to go and update my main story and my Christmas fic… I'm aiming to update all my stories today :) I hope that wasn't too OOC or anything.**

**Hmm… I feel like some Ghanith or Fletcherie next… I really need to write Fletcherie. It's my OTP and I haven't done a single story about it yet. But after the romance, I'll have something for you people who want Valkyrie single. I was really surprised at how popular that is on my poll.**

**Lots of love, (especially if you review ;) )**

**SapphireShadowgirl**


	7. Birthday thingmibob

**A/N Hi! Sorry for the absence. I've realised that I just CAN'T be a regular fan fic updater, so I'll post whenever something comes to mind with the exception of the Alice thing. I'm working on part two of that :) And I'm thinking about the Tesseract fic Ember, I swear :)**

**This thing isn't really a story. It's one of those things where you find the month you were born, and then the day, and see what it comes up with.**

**I don't think I explained that well, but whatever. I was a bit hesitant to put this up because it's not really a story. I looked at the guidelines and I can't see anything that says I can't post this, but if someone thinks I'm wrong please tell me and I'll delete it right away :)**

**Hope you like :)**

Jan; Tanith Low

Feb; Skulduggery Pleasant

Mar; Caelan

Apr; Erskine Ravel

May; Ghastly Bespoke

Jun; Madame Mist

Jul; Mevolent

Aug; China Sorrows

Sept; Fletcher Renn

Oct; Clarabelle

Nov; Valkyrie Cain

Dec; The Grotesquery

1. Ate a lollipop with you

2. Danced with you

3. Made your birthday cake

4. Fell madly in love with you

5. Hugged you

6. Tried to kill you

7. Taught you how to play piano

8. Wrote a poem for you

9. Wants to blow up your house

10. Taught you life skills such as cooking, sewing, knitting and assassination

11. Fought on your side

12. Kissed you

13. Imprisoned you

14. Is your best friend

15. Is your wife/husband

16. Stalks you

17. Is your babysitter

18. Wants to bake cup-cakes with you

19. Rules the world with you

20. Is your servant

21. Stole all your books

22. Taught you how to dance

23. Used to own your house

24. Is plotting your death

25. Is your teacher

26. Watches you sleep

27. Is your sidekick

28. Is wearing your T-shirt

29. Thinks you're scary

30. Is controlling your friends

31. Had a race with you


	8. Rescuing a sister part 2

Rescuing a sister part 2

**A/N Sorry it took me so long to get back to this! But here it is now :) I think it's probably go into a part THREE. On the other hand, it's given me an idea for an awesome story :) I don't think I wrote this particularly well, but then I suppose I haven't written in a while *guilty face***

Valkyrie paced back and forth, trying to work out who had taken her sister and preparing herself to beat the hell out of them. Skulduggery had decided that it was likely a sorcerer who had taken Alice by surprise. _They targeted my sister._

"Stop pacing," Skulduggery said softly. "We'll find her, Valkyrie." His eye sockets fixed on her gently. "I promise."

She wanted to reply, but there was a lump in her throat

"Valkyrie," Ghastly added, standing up from the couch where he, Fletcher and Ravel were seated, "We're doing everything we can. It's only a matter of time."

Valkyrie took a deep breath and tried not to see images of Alice being tortured, interrogated, killed.

"What if she doesn't have time?" she whispered.

**XxXxX**

_Alice was dreaming._

_She dreamt of shadows. They were everywhere, a cloud of darkness that circled around something she couldn't see. Alice looked down and saw that she was lying on the mossy stones, covered in blood. Her head swum and her muscles were so heavy she could barely twitch her finger. Her breath was a rasp that made her lungs ache and yet seemed to give her no oxygen at all. _

_The shadows came closer and closer. Alice wanted to scream. Somehow, instinctively, she knew that the woman who had kidnapped her was on the inside of those shadows._

_A tendril reached out and she forgot to breathe as it gently, almost tenderly stroked her face. It was strangely soft, but colder than she had ever imagined anything could be. Almost too tired to care, Alice fought with every ounce of energy she possessed to keep her eyes open._

_The shadows began to part in a wave, separating to reveal a dark shape that stepped out of the centre. It was…_

_Stephanie?_

Something hard slammed into her ribs with incredible force, driving all the breath from her body. Excruciating pain spread from her right side as her eyes shot open and she let out a cry of pain.

A dark face sneered down at her, sour green eyes sharp with disgust and as cold as the dungeon hell Alice was trapped in.

"Wake up, lazy brat," hissed her kidnapper.

**XxXxX**

_Wake up, you lazy brat._

A bolt of fear hit Cassandra Pharos as the vision engulfed her. She was lying down in a stone room that stunk of moss, mould and pain. Her body was much younger and smaller than Cassandra was used to. She was scared and her side felt like pure agony- some ribs must have broken. It was dark, but Cassandra could make out the shape of a short woman with dark hair in front of her. For some reason she didn't understand, those cold eyes sent a knife of fear into her heart. What was going on?

The edges of the scene started to disintegrate and a name swum into the edge of her mind.

_Alison Edgley._

The vision dissolved until Cassandra was back at her house, kneeling on the floor and gasping. She reached out for the phone.

**XxXxX**

Skulduggery fished his phone out of his pocket and pressed the answer button. Everyone was facing him with the same hopeful expression. He held up a finger.

"Hello?" he said smoothly. There was a pause. Valkyrie held her breath.

"Yes, she is. Why?" Skulduggery replied to whoever was on the other end of the phone. Suddenly he straightened abruptly. "Are you sure? Do you have an address?"

He fished a pen and paper out of pocket and scribbled something on a piece of paper.

"Yes. Thank you for sharing this with us. We really appreciate it." A gloved finger was coming up to press the end call button when suddenly, he froze.

"Could you repeat that?" the skeleton asked quietly. There was a hint of fear in his voice.

"Skulduggery?" Valkyrie asked. He held up a glove.

"Okay," he murmured. "Understood."

The apartment was silent as he replaced the phone and picked up his coat.

"Fletcher," he said urgently, nodding at the piece of paper on the table, "Can you teleport us to that location? It's near Haggard."

Fletcher read it and frowned. "I know the street. Val, it's where we used to get fish and chips from, remember?"

Valkyrie peered over her boyfriend's shoulder, her dark hair brushing his shoulder.

"Is that where Alice is?"

Skulduggery nodded. "That was Cassandra on the phone. It's hard to explain, but she might have an idea where Alice is."

Every nerve in Valkyrie's body was screaming at her to _go, _go and rescue her sister. She took a deep breath, ignoring the adrenaline rushing through her body.

"They took her to Haggard?" she frowned. "That doesn't make sense."

Skulduggery pulled a spare gun and loaded bullets into it. "I'm guessing whoever took her was a local sorcerer, solitary, with no idea that you lived nearby or who Alice was. It isn't someone with a grudge against you."

"Well, that narrows it down a lot," Valkyrie pointed out. There was a little flutter of hope in her heart. _It's not my fault. It was just chance._

"Everyone hold on," Fletcher commanded, holding out his arms. "I can take you to the corner of the street."

Ghastly rose gracefully and brushed off his jacket, reaching out for Fletcher's left shoulder. Skulduggery took up a position on the other side as Ravel held on to his arm.

Valkyrie swallowed hard and squeezed Fletcher's hand. He looked up and his lips rose ever so slightly in his trademark smirk just before the darkness swelled around them and they teleported.

**XxXxX**

The room was lit by spluttering candles. It was a few moments before Alice realised through her pain that the little heap in the corner was Olive. In this light, she looked even younger and incredibly vulnerable.

There was movement by one of the candles and she saw Rat awake for the first time. His hair was greasy and dangled in his face. His blue eyes darted from side to side. Scared. Lonely. On the edge of insanity.

Alice's rush of pity was stifled by shadow-woman grabbing her collar and hauling her to her feet. Alice fumbled at her neck, trying in vain to find some air. She stared in terror at the contorted face and wondered, somewhere in the back of her mind, if that was the last thing she'd ever see.

Olive's face seemed to grow paler and paler at the edge of her vision.

"O… live," Alice choked out as black spots appeared at the edge of her vision. Tears appeared at the corners of Olive's eyes, but she looked away, unable to meet Alice's gaze.

Shadow-woman dropped her. Alice curled in a ball, gasping for breaths that sent spikes of pain through her throat. Gradually the black spots faded, but her legs still felt weak and unable to support her weight.

"Get up," Shadow-woman hissed, "Before I do it again."

Alice grabbed the wall with the tips of her fingers and pulled herself up bit by bit until she was half-standing, half-leaning against the wall.

"Now," Shadow-woman said with a smile that sent ice through her veins, "What's your name?"

**A/N And I promise, I WILL update within the fortnight. And at Nello Orella's suggestion (Thanks!) I'm doing another quiz thing for those of you who know what I'm talking about :) I'm writing as much as I can amid homework, but you know what inspires to write really fast? REVIEWS! So please review! Lots of love to my readers :)**

**Saph xxx**


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